hands off the rope

"Let go."

These are two words I cringe to hear of. A sentence so short I often believe that it is illegal for any advice to be that simple, hence I dread it profusely. It basically is one of my toughest battles. 

It's like someone goes, "Sam, you need to le--" and I'm like all hands up, "Don't say it, no. Please don't say the l/g phrase." 

With that said, you must know today's sermon was a painfully good one if you were there too. Pastor did an amazing full-on message about letting go completely. And he did mean letting go, like for real. Letting go not with one hand grabbing onto the rope whilst the other is freely flapping about, that is just miserable.
"Let go, knowing that when you do, Jesus doesn't."

Letting go can happen only if you know Someone truly loves you. 

I've had Elijah Waters' 'Surprise Party' playing on repeat the last 2 days, whenever I could. 

It's too early for bed: Play.

I can't sleep: Play. 

I wake up in the middle of the night: Play.

I am on my way to church: Play.

I am waiting for service to start: Play.

I am done with service and lunch and waiting for my meeting to begin: Play.

I am done with the day and on me way home: Play.

I am here typing this to gather my thoughts: Play. 

I remember when I chanced upon the podcast (which has been rotting in my phone for months now), I was fighting my tears on the well-lit bus full of people. By the end of it, my hope jar was about to burst. 

I realised how much I did not understand God's love for me tho I thought I did, and how that really did not affect the extent of which He loved me ---- only measureable to His own life. I begin to realise how God can take me, (quoting Ps Elijah) "from a small mimic pussy cat, and turn me into a big bold lion."
That is what love can do. 

This broke my heart good and really, I started to get excited.

A super huge reminder: Grace is for today.

The manna God provided for the Israelis lasted them for that day. So, I've decided to thank God and praise Jesus for my daily manna, knowing that He supplies for my needs, that He is made strong in my weaknesses, instead of worrying for the manna I need in 2 days' time (which btw I cannot eat even if I could see it....)

Lengthy lion, yes I am a lion, not a pussy cat--- and I'm still learning how to completely be conscious of Christ; to remind myself to stop gripping onto the rope for my dear life till my hands are bleeding and worn out as though I am living life on my own. My life was paid for, my life was redeemed and my life continues from here, 03/09/12 2:48am, belonging to the One who gave up everything for me. 

I am gonna stop being a proud pork knuckle thinking my entire life credits my own goodness.

I am nothing. He is everything. 

Goodnight beautiful people ~